WORRIES OF A MOTHER....

It's funny, the worries of a mother. I worry about a lot of things. And I mean A LOT of things. And sometimes I worry so much that I find myself shutting down because I don't know how to take care of the things I am worrying about. Am I the only one??

But right now I worry about my boy. And please keep in mind, this is me, the mother, worrying about my son. My thoughts might be random, sporadic, and loosely tied together. I might not make any sense and some of you might even say, "hey? What are you talking about??" :)

Anyone that knows my middle boy knows he's a good kid. He's a super good boy; one of the best. Is he perfect...not even close. But boy do I love him. Every day I look at him and I thank my lucky stars...EVERY DAY!

But I have to be honest. The move has been really really hard on him. We went from having kids EVERYWHERE to searching high and low to find someone his own age. There is only one boy in his primary class. There are NO six year olds around us...NONE that I can find. So he either plays with his sister's friends, OR he plays with younger kids.

He found a friend in preschool last year and they had soooo much fun together. We had him over a few times and the mom kept saying she would have him over...NEVER HAPPENED. Finally it fizzled out(heaven forbid you live 10 minutes away).

His good friend from Kindergarten just transfered classes. Another friend that, in his eyes, is gone. I keep in very close contact with the mother and we are trying to keep on top of playdates.

He has gone from happy about everything, excited to learn, loves everything, to almost sad. I've noticed it and have tried to make a special effort to schedule playdates(in this town you have to "schedule" playdates. It's like it puts people out to invite kids over or have their kids come over...a huge negative). He is the boy that bears his testimony every Fast Sunday. His heart is as big as the sun. He truly cares about his family and the people that he loves.

At home he has become more agressive, more disobedient. Agressive, he has always been-he loves karate, Star Wars, etc so its always been there. Disobedience has not been in his character.

The kicker....his school teacher pulled me aside the other day and let me know that she has noticed the change in him. That he has gone from participating to hanging his head. He keeps to himself and doesn't hardly talk even when he is called on. Thank goodness his aggression and disobedience hasn't rolled over to school.

My heart is breaking! BREAKING! What does a parent do? I love playing with him. We have a lot of fun together but he LOOOVES to play with friends. Don't get me wrong, he has friends. But something is missing - some void that he hasn't been able to fill since we moved here and it is TRULY breaking my heart.

Oh, and please, mothers of his friends...he LOVES to play with your kids. Please don't misinterpret this post as anything but a mothers' random worries. I've only pulled out random examples and thoughts....

A sob story...my sob story. But I hope that in a few days, weeks, months, whenever, I will be able to look back and say to myself, "what was I worried about??".